bend your arms

and mostly get to know who i really am. i wish i knew who i was.
i wish i knew what i really want, so i could pursuit and
i wish i was important. like the characters i read about.
i wish i mattered. had a story someone wants to tell.
someday, maybe.
i never meant to say i'm sorry, it kind of slipped from my mouth.
all these songs in our childish lips make me ache.
i want life to happen to me. i'm more comfortable reading than talking to people. and though i have no one to write for, my fingertips tingle every once in a while, can't think of anything but ink.
i can't keep focus. most likely to sleep my way
and lay awake at night. don't have anyone or anything to think about.
way overprotected. of myself. by myself.
maybe if i stopped trying to be what i think is okay and just do what i want.
if i write it in english then it's a secret.
in short, i want my life to matter.